a few words, if i may.
so there i was a couple of months ago thinking to myself,
you know what i'm terrified of, Self? the Abyss. man, why the f is that so scary? my therapist tells me that this particular fear is fear of fear and nothing else (and therein, fear of nothing), and i know a lot of smarter people have been saying this all along [see: seriously bad-ass Inaugural Address, FDR, 1933], but why is that gaping blackness called Not Knowingness so fucking terrifying sometime??
ya. so there i was, just really wanting to just fling myself off that scary metaphysical Ledge that hovers over that abyss since i was slipping off anyway, which is what this amazing grease of Life does. you're standing around wringing your bony hands peering through half closed lids into the churning darkness for too long thinking you really do want to jump that you've had enough of just standing there and staring into it but isn't it going to hurt but oh man you sooo want to jump because who knows what's down there, it might be something good, like fresh cake or Doritoes or mind-blowing sex and people who aren't assholes and chocolate or fairies who sprinkle pixie dust and make your wildest dreams come true OR you might just land on your ass and have it really really really hurt like teeth shakingly hurt like when some douchebag's Jaguar goes over a massive pothole on the FDR so who wants to jump because aren't most of us just big fat whiney pussies anyway and THAT'S when Life, who's been the patient friend who never laughs at your antics standing around behind you now starts getting seriously bored with your lame ambivalence just steps forward and says later bitch! and helps you out with a nice solid but loving shove right between the shoulder blades or a swift but kind kick to the arse more likely and off you go, cartwheeling and tumbling into the Darkness, into the Unknown.
everyone said to either stay away from the Ledge, or get off it, but i am happy to report that the Abyss is only what you make of it, or in other words, it's only YOU, and the real journey doesn't seem to begin until you get there, so i'll tell you what was saddled up waiting patiently at the bottom of mine: Pegasus. and a really really good cupcake too.
so there i was a couple of months ago thinking to myself,
you know what i'm terrified of, Self? the Abyss. man, why the f is that so scary? my therapist tells me that this particular fear is fear of fear and nothing else (and therein, fear of nothing), and i know a lot of smarter people have been saying this all along [see: seriously bad-ass Inaugural Address, FDR, 1933], but why is that gaping blackness called Not Knowingness so fucking terrifying sometime??
ya. so there i was, just really wanting to just fling myself off that scary metaphysical Ledge that hovers over that abyss since i was slipping off anyway, which is what this amazing grease of Life does. you're standing around wringing your bony hands peering through half closed lids into the churning darkness for too long thinking you really do want to jump that you've had enough of just standing there and staring into it but isn't it going to hurt but oh man you sooo want to jump because who knows what's down there, it might be something good, like fresh cake or Doritoes or mind-blowing sex and people who aren't assholes and chocolate or fairies who sprinkle pixie dust and make your wildest dreams come true OR you might just land on your ass and have it really really really hurt like teeth shakingly hurt like when some douchebag's Jaguar goes over a massive pothole on the FDR so who wants to jump because aren't most of us just big fat whiney pussies anyway and THAT'S when Life, who's been the patient friend who never laughs at your antics standing around behind you now starts getting seriously bored with your lame ambivalence just steps forward and says later bitch! and helps you out with a nice solid but loving shove right between the shoulder blades or a swift but kind kick to the arse more likely and off you go, cartwheeling and tumbling into the Darkness, into the Unknown.
everyone said to either stay away from the Ledge, or get off it, but i am happy to report that the Abyss is only what you make of it, or in other words, it's only YOU, and the real journey doesn't seem to begin until you get there, so i'll tell you what was saddled up waiting patiently at the bottom of mine: Pegasus. and a really really good cupcake too.
