i remember my dad telling me a story once about some dude who had just come over from [then] USSR. he had taken him to a Wegmans upstate where, as soon you walk in, they're accosting your face and dignity with 18 different types of bread and cheese samples (i personally highly prefer the very luscious olive load. loaf, i mean). the guy had walked in to this superstore-on-steroids after a life spent choosing from only one kind of pickle, and he just knelt down and cried. maybe he didn't exactly crouch and weep, maybe my dad was being helpfully dramatic, maybe he just moved off to the side a bit so as not to be run over by suburbia on grocery-cart wheels and became slightly misty-eyed, but i'm gonna stick with the first version, that is, of him doubled over in grateful hysterics, reciting the pledge.
maybe that's why i need to pop a xanax every time i'm forced into collecting sundry at a fucking supermarket now. all those shelves of shit and shit and shit and shit. fat people, skinny people, white people, black people, everyone just loading up on lemon loaf and oversized bananas and capers and cottage cheese and a gazillion different pastas and juices and sauces and meats and poultry and detergents and toothpastes...geh!! all of it just makes my pretty little head spin. i wonder what it's like in parts of the world like Liberia where you're just grateful your goat hasn't croaked in the past month. the concept of a cheesy-ass nacho Dorito would probably blow your fucking mind, meanwhile, here we run the gamut from a 25¢ bag of stale Utz at the bodega, to a Key Food Special of $7.99 for a 6-family pack of tortilla based product that would probably feed aforementioned Liberian for three months running. God, i love America, but that is just fucking gross.
these are black and white cookies from Peter Pan Bakery in Greenpoint. not a better black and white exists. not on the face of the planet, not in this Universe.
maybe that's why i need to pop a xanax every time i'm forced into collecting sundry at a fucking supermarket now. all those shelves of shit and shit and shit and shit. fat people, skinny people, white people, black people, everyone just loading up on lemon loaf and oversized bananas and capers and cottage cheese and a gazillion different pastas and juices and sauces and meats and poultry and detergents and toothpastes...geh!! all of it just makes my pretty little head spin. i wonder what it's like in parts of the world like Liberia where you're just grateful your goat hasn't croaked in the past month. the concept of a cheesy-ass nacho Dorito would probably blow your fucking mind, meanwhile, here we run the gamut from a 25¢ bag of stale Utz at the bodega, to a Key Food Special of $7.99 for a 6-family pack of tortilla based product that would probably feed aforementioned Liberian for three months running. God, i love America, but that is just fucking gross.
these are black and white cookies from Peter Pan Bakery in Greenpoint. not a better black and white exists. not on the face of the planet, not in this Universe.
