20110920

forget and forgive

prancing along a city street this morning, I saw a nun.  she wasn't prancing, I was, but boy did i fall in love.  she was tucked in a doorway, evidently waiting for the bus, and i couldn't take my eyes off her.  i just stared and stared as i walked on by.  she stared back, if you must know, probably because, in a recent attempt to let go of old, overaggressive inhibitions, i've shed some black (from my person...al wardrobe) of late, for the other side, that being white or whiteish, and it is very possible that she might have just thought i was an angel, all streaming super sexy down the street toward her.  she was so damn cute, one of those grandmommy faces, the jowels, the eye glasses, the white hair coming out from under her habit.  oh!  it was the perfect pressed habit, with a crisp black polyester jacket, her black skirt at midcalf and the finger-thick hose stuffed into her comfortable old lady hospital nurse nun shoes, and you know what happened???  she smiled!  she smiled at ME, and being all startled, i smiled back. hellooooo Magic!

the ONLY things i regret in life include NOT having accepted 5th row center tickets to a Prince concert at Madison Square Garden ("dumb------ass" does not come remotely near to serving this situation justice), and making a big HUGE devastating mistake a couple of years ago that just continues to eat my heart and soul right out.  being all estranged from God, i thought i could forgive myself, but it doesn't seem to be working.  who gives absolution these days?  i shoulda asked the nun.